Thursday, August 14, 2008
The Waiting Game...
This is getting entirely too old. I've been on pins and needles for weeks now and I still know nothing about my health. I've been in and out of the friggin hospital and left with more questions than answers. To those that don't know, don't freak out, I'm fine... just trying to figure out if something I found is hazardous to my health and/or needs to be removed. But seriously, LET ME KNOW PLEASE! I'm tired of tossing in my sleep every night because the thought of a scalpel touching my skin makes me shake.
And of course since I'm not feeling good and am stressed I'm not much of myself lately. Then people wonder what's up with me or act like I'm being stupid. My sincere apologies for not being chipper and cheerfully sarcastic like I usually am. I'm really trying ya'll. :(
I feel like I'm just one big epic fail at this point. My life causes frustration and stress to others. There are times when I want to crawl into a very large dark hole and just wait till the storm passes. I'd say this is one of those times. Just to sit silently and listen to the nothingness. Just relax and wait. Then come back out when the dust settles back down. I'm just so tired.
Trying to keep my head above water is the easy part. It's harder to not be tempted to just float away.